Mark Grace is a reporter's dream, always offering a post-game gem of a quote. Over his many seasons, both with the Cubs and the Diamondbacks, Mark has experienced just about every emotion a ballplayer can. From the depths of frustration to the heights of a World Championship, Grace always maintains his unique sense of humor and humbleness regardless of the situation. Here are some classic examples of Mark's attempts to put those feelings into words. These quotes are also fun to share through conference calls unlimited services with a faraway friend who loves baseball.

On giving up a homerun to rookie David Moss in his relief pitching appearance on September 2, 2002...
"I didn't have a scouting report on him. Obviously he can hit 65 mph fastballs."

On meeting the Yankees in the World Series, October 2001...
"I've never been to Yankee Stadium. I've never played the Yankees all these years. I've always been in the National League, and, believe it or not, the Cubs have never played the Yankees in the postseason."

On his rally-starting single in the 9th inning of World Series Game 7...
"I knew I had to get on base for anything to happen. I thought to myself, a concussion heals in 30 days, right?"

On the feeling of playing in and winning a World Series, October 2001...
"If you only understood how great this is for me. It was better than anything I could've imagined. It is better than sex. But then again, I'm kind of lousy at that."

On the accuracy of his bobblehead doll, given away at Bank One Ballpark on August 18, 2001...
"I'm a pretty ugly guy, and it's a pretty ugly doll, so I think they did of good job of capturing my likeness."

On his release from the Cubs following the 1999 season...
"I wanted to be a Cub forever. Everybody knew that. Then I was awfully, shockingly non-tendered by the Cubs. They were saying we are not interested in Mark Grace at any price. Not for one dollar and not for $20 million. And because they've waited two months to tell me this, now I'm scrambling for a job, and I'm fucking pissed. Sammy wanted me out. They sold their soul to the devil and look what they got out of it."

On Cubs teammate Kerry Wood and his 20 strikeout game, May 5, 1998...
"He was electric. He's too young and stupid to understand what he just did. He's just a baby. He's only 20, for crying out loud."

On the 1998 Cubs,and their run to the wild-card and pennant...
"This team makes your ulcers have a baby."

On Cubs teammate Shawn Dunston...
"I owe him a lot. Nobody would know how good I was at digging balls out of the dirt if it wasn't for him and all those bad throws."

On the definition of a "slumpbuster", after being pressed by host Jim Rome in a now-infamous 2003 interview on the television show "Rome is Burning" to clarify the baseball slang term (this is the "official" word-for-word transcript from the interview)...
"A slumpbuster is if a team's in a slump, or if you personally are in a slump, you gotta find the fatest, gnarliest, grossest chick and you just gotta lay the wood to her. And when you do that, you're just gonna have instant success. And it could also be called jumping on a grenade for the team."

On living in the moment..
"The most important thing about playing baseball is to have fun. I'm about to start my 13th year, but I can remember my rookie season like it was yesterday. It goes fast, folks."

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